Since I began my journey in happiness and well-being research and started to conduct coaching sessions, I discovered something new every day regarding people’s perception of happiness in life, from the way they deal or understand their own happiness, a part of coaching sessions, I have shared my own experience, and how was my challenges in life to reach the way whom I am now.
Here are some of the simple secrets I discovered. First, communication, yes, how to communicate and cope with the situation, people around you, work, difficult times, sickness, enjoyment, even how to communicate things to yourself, as most of us learned to work hard, in order to be happy but, NEIL PASRICHA, said the word in his great book, “the equation of happiness”.
Just be happy first, with the things you have now, with your current life, with your status, with your health, and move on, most of my students, keep waiting to feel this feeling or moment in happiness, as they have paused, till happiness come and take their hands to smile, please don’t wait, just feel the gratitude given to you, and then start your plan, achieve, help others, take care of your health and take care of your beloved ones, and enjoy the moment, communicate with the spirit around you to feel the difference, enjoy your cup of tea with you mother, enjoy the conversation you had with friends, enjoy your work and overcome the obstacles, enjoy working with team, with differences, I know work environments has many challenges and obstacles, and I have faced it many times, but with the way I managed myself how to communicate with others, and fits with myself, I discovered, there is nothing worth it to be upset for, just communicate and understand that all this is a phase and it will go, focus and enjoy your productivity every day.
If you have projects or tasks in work and you have completed four or five of them, enjoy the achievements, and make a list to complete others to be happy, not to think of the missing 5 or 6 tasks not done, you have the time when you are well-organized and happy, your peace of mind will assist you to communicate all this in every mindful way.
Promotion or raise is great, but your self-esteem is unvalued also, the way you look at yourself when you look behind 5 years ago, and how you have developed your skills, your communication, your life, and you’re still developing further and further and enjoying each moment of this success, as per the ISO standards, to have continual improvements, which all we are looking for, to improve every day, when I asked my students do you have a self-motivation, most of them they were looking for others to start, again don’t’ wait, communicate immediately to your mind to motivate, read books, watch motivational videos, YouTube, TikTok, and be kind to yourself in a way you feel that it will help you, and add value to your life. As mentioned by NEIL PASRICHA, we tend to over-emphasize others’ opinions because of a lack of self-confidence. Our self-judgment leads us to (i) hide things about ourselves, or (ii) apologize for them.
True confidence is about having a high opinion of yourself and others. It requires self-acceptance, just accept the way you are and keep developing, when I look at myself ten years ago, and how people keep judging me, even when I started my Ph.D., they also judge, what you will do with this certificate, I realized at that moment that I have a self-confidence not to listen to this kind of comments, and keep moving, and surround myself with great support people, all of us needs to have this kind of people, family or friends keep this support system near to you to have their backup and another way of motivation.
Another small secret, I would like to share is to spend your valuable time doing what you love or enjoy, yes, just do it and think about how you will add value to yourself and others, most of the therapist treatments now in the USA, encourage their depression patients, to do things by giving, “give to get”, volunteer, it’s not only by donating money but also time, efforts, when you go to help others, I am sure that you will feel 10 times happier when you see yourself that you helped others. Keep the balance in your life, work well, sleep well, eat healthily, and do some exercise at least walking for 10 minutes, daily it will make you feel better and energetic, and don’t forget that it will increase your happiness hormone level “dopamine”.
Again, as per the happiness equation book, just “be you”, when someone asked “What do you want to be when you grow up?”, it assumes that you have only 1 goal in life, which simply isn’t true. Instead, you can be you, that every day you have too many things to do not only 1 goal, be an ikigai, i.e., a current purpose that gets you out of bed in the morning. The book itself ikigai, inspired me personally and others, when I conducted workshops and highlighted the purpose of life, ikigai, in a simple way I give them myself an example, I love happiness and well-being coaching, I am doing it after working hours, I enjoying it, I am good at it, and people appreciate it, still I didn’t leave an international impact as public influencer figure, but who knows, I am still making my happiness happened with the people around me, keep happy and enjoy life, there are so many things we can do it here.