Have you been feeling stressed? Do you feel like it’s eating you out with all the current circumstances that are happening? Well it’s quite obvious that the reason behind this is because you have mixed emotions which you have only expressed in unproductive ways. These emotions are the main cause of your stress.
Stress is a natural response to feeling attacked, deceived, frustrated or treated unfairly.In order for you to know how to manage your stress, you have to understand it first.
Stress isn’t always a ‘bad’ emotion; in fact it can sometimes be useful and motivate us to create change.Stress only becomes a problem when it harms you or the people around you. This can happen when you regularly express your stress through unhelpful or destructive behavior, or when your stress is having a negative impact on your overall mental and physical health.
When you are anxious, your body creates energy. With this excess of energy,adrenaline and other chemicals enter your bloodstream,your heart pumps faster, your blood flows more quickly, and your muscles tense.Stress doesn’t always come from our external environment; it is often self-generated.
Some of the things that cause internal stress are:
- Worrying about things that are out of our control;
- Automatic Negative Thinking (ANT);
- Criticizing ourselves;
- Imagining the worst;
- Holding unrealistic standards;
- Taking on too many responsibilities.
Stress problems have less to do with what happens to you than how you interpret and think about what happened, such as overgeneralizing -for instance: “You ALWAYS interrupt me. You NEVER consider my needs. EVERYONE disrespects me”and obsessing on “shoulds” and “musts”. Having a rigid view of the way things should or must be and getting angry when reality doesn’t line up with this vision.
Even mind-reading and jumping to conclusions: Assuming you “know” what someone else is thinking or feeling—that he or she intentionally upset you, ignored your wishes, or disrespected you.Collecting straws; looking for things to get upset about, usually while overlooking or blowing past anything positive. Letting these small irritations build and build until you reach the “final straw” and explode, often over something relatively minor.
There are several ways to manage your stress, here are some tips that can help lead the way:
Avoid people, places, and situations that make you stressed. Look at your regular routine and try to identify activities, times of day, people, places, or situations that trigger irritable or stress feelings. Maybe you get into a fight every time you go out for drinks with a certain group of friends; maybe the traffic on your daily commute drives you crazy. Then think about ways to avoid these triggers or view the situation differently.
Psychologists have proven that most of the following techniques can help you cool down and keep your stress under control. First of all take some deep breaths, exercise, and use your senses. Take advantage of the relaxing power of your sense of sight, smell, hearing, touch, and taste. You might try listening to music or picturing yourself in a favorite place. Furthermore, always give yourself a reality check. Identifying the real source of frustration will help you communicate your stress better, take constructive action, and work towards a resolution.
When you feel like your stress is beginning to take over your life, it means that you have let out your emotions through negative ways. You have to take back control and go through several steps to start managing your stress.
When you start getting upset about something, take a moment to think about the situation. Ask yourself: How important is it in the grand scheme of things?Is it really worth getting stressed about it?Is it worth ruining the rest of my day?Is my response appropriate to the situation?Is there anything I can do about it? Is taking action worth my time?Always focus on what you can do in the present to solve the problem.
By, Darine Amhaz Beydoun, Certified Life Coach & NLP Practitioner
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